Belief

What do you believe in?  I am not talking about ghosts, or the financial system, or even politics, rather I am talking about the “something more” or lack thereof which makes our lives better overall.  If you don’t believe in anything beyond this life, in my estimation, you are missing out on something grand and supportive.  If you do, what is it that makes this “something more” special for you?

Whatever you believe in, consider that it should make your world larger, open your mind to greater possibilities, support you with stronger confidence, and inspire peace of mind during times of difficulties.  What you believe in should allow you to live in harmony with others, rather than cause conflict or worse yet, incite violence.  It should provide you with a secure place in the world, and help you see ways in which to make the world a better place for all its inhabitants, rather than having the feeling of being out for number one.

It doesn’t matter what you call your “something more,” rather that you have a connection to it, and that you practice that connection in a way that makes sense to you.  Whether you pray, meditate, connect with nature, breathe in natural light, or sit in a pew at church, you are improving your life and the lives of people around you.  Doing so with regularity will strengthen the bond you have with this energy, improve the results of what you do, and give you a path to follow in your relationships, your work, and your life.

May you be richly blessed.

Dealing with Loss

From time to time, we have to deal with the loss of loved ones, jobs, pets, homes, our health and fitness, and many other things that hold meaning to our hearts.  It is difficult, and we can expect to go through a period of mourning the loss, regardless of what it may be.  There is little we can say except to understand that this is a part of life and that it will happen.
All too often we feel as if we are in control of our lives.  The most difficult thing, then, when we feel loss, is that we have no control over the loss: when it will happen, where, and how it affects our lives and the people we love.  It is the loss of control that may seem the most disturbing to us, aside from having something or someone taken from us who makes our lives better.
What happens, then, is important.  It is greatly necessary that we allow ourselves to mourn.  Mourning allows our hearts to heal, allows us to go through the various stages that Psychology tells us to expect.  These take us from denial of the loss, or sometimes the importance of the loss; through anger, sometimes anger with God for allowing this to happen; bargaining to bring back what has been lost; and finally, resolution of the loss and acceptance of having to live our lives and move on.  While everyone experiences mourning in different ways, it is important to allow the process so that healing can occur.
The rituals of our society help us to heal and remember the people we have lost.  Funerals allow us to pay our respects and memorialize our lost loved ones.  Some people set up shrines with pictures, mementos and journals that remind them of the person who has been so special in their lives.  Most faiths dedicate ways in which our lost loved ones are honored and direct our belief in their continued existence on another level or plane.  All of these things are comforting.
If you find yourself having difficulty with some kind of loss, perhaps gathering pictures, objects, papers, and anything else that may be related to the loss into a special box that you have decorated to remind you of whom or what you have lost, then put the box aside, taking it out once a week to review your feelings.  You may want to keep a journal of what you feel over time.  You may find that you take the box out less frequently.  That is all right.  It is a sign of healing.  In time, you may find you don’t need to look in the box at all, except for special occasions, such as the anniversary of the loss.  This, too, is a sign of healing. 
May you be richly blessed.

Laughter Makes the Heart Grow Lighter

We live in tremulous times.  Every day, there is some new horror unleashed upon the public, whether it is related to war, the environment, society or agriculture.  People speak of the End Times, observing and hoping that life cannot get worse.  How do we cope with these events?  We can’t simply rely on ignoring them; they aren’t going away.
What we must do is focus on the positive things in our lives.  Do you have a job?  Hurrah!  Is your family fed?  Superb!  Can you celebrate the weekend in some way?  Laugh at something that is silly and joyful?  You are well on your way to coping not only with the difficulties of the world, but healing your heart.
These times are especially difficult for empathic people, who feel the emotions and energies of others.  While spending time isolated from the energy of others is helpful, doing things that allow expression of energy, such as laughter, is the single most healing activity for an empath.  That means it is also healing to the general public as we try to shed some of the nervous anxiety that these times are bringing.
If you can play silly board games, listen to light-hearted comedians, tell jokes or puns that create an atmosphere of joy, you should be able to laugh to your heart’s benefit.  In these times, as they have said for years, laughter IS the best medicine.  Find it and be healed.
May you be richly blessed!

Harmony Now

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We hear so much about bullying these days. It is frightening to read about young people being assaulted because they are not a party to an in-group. It doesn’t require that they have done anything wrong. It only requires that they are not like someone else or a group of someones. It is more frightening to think that group bullying results in attacks on an individual.

We need to look at each person, how they feel about themselves. A bully doesn’t have personal power and so, takes it out on others. This makes him feel powerful by having the ability to intimidate or physically harm another. In truth, the bully relates to the feeling of powerlessness that the victim has, and thereby, is causing the weakness within himself to suffer. It’s a case of, “I feel bad, you’re weaker than me, so I’m going to assault you so I can feel powerful.”
It would be nice if we lived in a world where each child was loved and valued for the individual blessing that he or she is. It would be nice if all parents loved and valued their children. But the truth is, we don’t and they don’t. Schools do the best they can to give children a positive self-image, but they can’t monitor all children at all times. Home for many children is a war zone. The bully himself is often responding to the environment in which he lives.
There is no easy solution. So long as parents ridicule children, use violence in the home, create an atmosphere of shame and abuse, and voice prejudices which set up their children to take hostilities out on others they see as less powerful, there is going to be bullying. Acceptance of the differences of others, no matter what those differences are, is the first step in a long line of creating harmony.
We need to set aside the mentality of good people versus bad people. Ok, we can agree that Darth Vader was a bad guy. But we need to recognize that it is the actions of people in harming others that are bad, and that is what we need to work at ending: no more assault, no rape, no verbal abuse, no more lack of tolerance just because someone is different in his or her beliefs, behaviour, appearance, lifestyle, or choices. We need harmony now.
May you be richly blessed.

Personalities

It is often said that we dislike in others that which we cannot see in ourselves. Also, when you point a finger at someone else, there are three pointing back at you. Yes, it is true that it is hard to see ourselves, except when the mirror is on those near us.

There are many parts to our personalities. Some parts we may like, other parts we may not like. But it is very difficult to look in the mirror and say to ourselves, “I want to stop doing such and such.” It takes someone of great emotional depth, maturity and courage.
As with anything else, we begin by identifying that there is a problem. An example would be the current political discussions that are ongoing so long after the election. Both sides accuse the other of lies and misinformation. We are all victims of our news sources, but we tend to believe that we are victims of the opposite political activity. This is not about having a victim mentality, but we really do need to consider whether or not the opposing side is as “stupid” or as “unfeeling” as we see them as being represented. Are there really people out there who would like to see a weak, elderly, disabled person kicked off Social Security? Really?

The point is, we each need to look at our humanity and decide whether our cynicism and sarcastic natures are contributing to our higher good and the higher good of everyone. We like to think we live in a majority rules society, so the bottom line is that we should have to follow the dictates of what is best for the majority without intentionally injuring the minority.
If you can look into the mirror each day and say that what you do contributes to the betterment of the whole, then the darkness in your personality is sure to grow shades lighter.
May you be richly blessed.

Sisters

Throughout our lives there are things that are very important to us. For some, this yearning comes early in life, and may reflect something that we want in the full depths of our hearts. It may show something that is missing, some dark void that needs to be filled.
For me, this was my desire to have a sister. I had three older brothers who were never neglectful of picking on me and making my life sad and tormented. I was aware, early on, that my mother had given birth to a daughter four years before me, but that the child had died at birth. In addition, she had hydrocephalus and could not have survived.

I so longed to have a sister with whom to share secrets, learn from, get hand-me-downs, and just play. But alas, it was not to be.
It wasn’t until I was a grown woman that sisters began to appear in my life. I learned upon the death of my father, a man I hadn’t known, that I had a half-sister who was older. It was a pleasant connection. We became briefly acquainted and we had some things in common. Unfortunately, distance and events, and the fact that she had a large family of sisters on her own, prevented the cementing of a close relationship between us.
As I grew older, in fact, reaching retirement, I found that I had two more sisters. One of whom was welcoming and friendly and good-natured, and the other of whom had no interest in connecting at all. These relationships filled me with confusion. I wondered why God would send whom I felt I needed for my life to be fulfilled when I no longer felt the need. Yes, my prayers were answered, but it seemed too late.
The moral of the story is that God will answer your prayers. God will also make things happen in His time, not yours. But the key here is not that I didn’t want and need my sisters, rather I needed to develop that part of myself which was capable of standing on its own, speaking with my own voice, becoming who I was meant to be, rather than being a tin-type of another woman.
Would life have been different if my sisters had been known to me earlier? Certainly. But if there had been rejection early on, I may not have been able to deal with it. My brothers were brutal at an early age, perhaps even abusive, but on my own, I withstood it, I learned to fight back, and now I can enjoy my sisters as people with independent choices and lifestyles, without feeling unduly pressured to be something other than who I am.
May you be richly blessed.

Accepting Responsibility

Life is hard at times. There may seem that there is no end to the challenges that come across our life paths. All we need do is read the headlines in the newspaper to know just how trying these times are. Coping takes a little extra work.
Putting our own lives in order may be even more of a challenge under the circumstances. But it is by accepting responsibility for ourselves and our relationships with others that we manage to cope. If you have an itch, wouldn’t you scratch it? Of course you would. If you break something in a store, generally you have to pay for it. Life is that same way. When something in life goes awry, you take steps to deal with it. To do anything less only results in more and more problems.

What is the first thing to do to accept responsibility? We must acknowledge that we are the ones who made the choices that created the situation that we are in. Whether this has to do with problems with others, problems with substances, or even a lack of work, telling yourself that you are the one who made the choices, acted a certain way, did or did not do something, it all boils down to you. Excuses aside, you have to face the choices that you have made which have created where you have been, where you are now, and where you are going.
Once you can fully accept responsibility for your problems, you can create a plan of action to get yourself into a better space. You may need help to guide you through this difficult course of action. But think of where you want to be, write an affirmation about what you want, for example: I have a job that will pay all of my bills and allow me to enjoy life. With affirmations, writing them on little slips of paper and posting them around your home or office where you will see them throughout your day, then whispering the affirmation three times when you see the paper, you will create energy on a metaphysical level which will initiate energy to bring what you want into being. It will also help you have a positive mindset to face your problems in a responsible manner.
Next, it’s time to take action. If you’re looking for work, spend your day on the road going from business to business. Sure, there are a limited number of employers actually looking for employees, but the more you show up, the more likely they are to believe you really want a job, and will actually work once there.
Maybe your goal has to do with stopping some kind of behaviour, like substances. Get with a support group and follow the steps. You can do it.

Whatever your problems, accepting that it’s all about you and taking responsibility, then acting on the goals you set will put you on the path to positive reform.