Coping With Anger

What value does anger serve?  In the past, anger was part of the Fight or Flight mechanism that protected us from real, physical threats.  But today, things we don’t like tend to get us in an uproar.  Perhaps we cannot discriminate between things that can actually do us harm and things that, for example, hurt our feelings.  Rather than feeling the hurt, because the other person is important to us, we tend to allow ourselves to become angry, which then lengthens the time before we acknowledge what is truly going on with us.

When anger becomes the modus operendi of our lives, we end up with a perpetual chip on our shoulders.  We burn up our emotional energy, raise our anxiety levels, and increase our fears of most situations.  It makes it difficult to connect with others.  We may become suspicious, jealous, fearful and so on, as we try to deal with the overwhelming levels of anger that we feel.  In this respect, anger is a symptom.

Overcoming the anger is not an easy thing.  It tends to cover up what we are really experiencing so that we don’t have to acknowledge what we may feel are weaknesses in our protective armor.  Having a safe place to share feelings, whether with a close friend or family member, can help reduce the anger and keep us from acting out.  We can acknowledge that we are angry, without having to act on it.

From a spiritual perspective, anger is never a way to resolve matters.  Loving those with whom we come into contact is important. While that love is not intended to put us on a pedestal, it does allow us to provide a positive example for others and helps us to resolve matters with a level head.  In this case, love provides the basis for listening to others with compassion.  It allows us to give of ourselves to help raise others up in the world.  It allows us to see the good in others, perhaps to allow them to see it, as well.  Where there is love, anger doesn’t have much of a chance.

May you be richly blessed!